When Relationship Goes Bad

In 2007, I wrote this article, Five Signs That Tell Your Relationship is Over based on how I felt, and experienced. I'm not one to gloat about how many views this article has received, or how much money it has earned me. However, I just know that this article is still circulating very strong, and I've received a number of requests through email for advices on when to throw in the towel.

However, I am not trained as an expert in relationship. I can only offer my own experiences as stepping stones for those that need a little road map.

Determine the stages of your relationship

Write down as many questions as you might have. The act of writing it out helps clarify your thinking, and gives you a concrete perspective.
  • Can this relationship be saved?
  • Do I want to save it?
  • What makes you happy?
  • How many times has it happened in the past?
  • How long did it takes before things slip back to the old mold?
  • Can you both find a way to work things out?
  • Are you both committed to a change for the better?
  • What holds you back?
  • What are your fears?
  • What do you really want?
  • How much longer can you take?
  • Why are you unhappy?
Take some times to look over your questions, and answer each one in great details. Keep a journal while you are going through this hard time. It is not only release your anxiety feelings, but it is also served as direction when you're looking back.

The "ah-ha" moment for each person is different, and so is the endurance level. Some can take it for the rest of their lives, but some must break away in order to rebuild their lives. No one can tell the other what to do or when to throw in the towel. Only you can tell when the time is right.

Explore your heart and your mind. Take some steps to save your relationship, go to couple counseling, or family counseling, because it takes hard work to mend a broken relationship.

If you need additional reading materials on relationship, hop over to Anne's blog TheRelationshipSuperMarket.com to read her wonderful articles.

Do you have an "ah-ha" moment to share? I would love to know..

(Reposting from my old blog WT)

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